Another Ministry (or two) Falls to Raycism - Part 1

The Unitarian Universalist Association has been creating a narrative about raycism and the ministry. Like all narratives (stories, works of fiction, etc.) there has to be a basis in truth in order for people to relate. However, a narrative is a work of fiction.

When one is aware of a narrative in play, one is wise to look at who is telling the particular story and then ask oneself why they are telling this story. It seldom has to do with the truth and usually with manipulation through feelings. What are the feelings they are narrating? How does this benefit the story-teller? Does it benefit others? Or, is that just the tale we're told? In other words, what's the narrator's agenda?

The current narrative is that if any person of color in the ministry has troubles in their ministry, it is due exclusively to white institutional raycism and nothing else. I'm using the spelling "raycism" because of it's casual weaponized overuse the word racism has lost its meaning. It's used so casually, and raised at the most trivial of imagined or made up slights, that it literally means nothing. Truth is the word raycism is so completely overused in a hair-trigger manner that the bludgeon it was meant to be is now experienced as a pea-shooter. There's nothing behind it, because no thought went into it.

In fact, there is a simple disarming response to being casually called raycist, sexist, or other ists. Simply reply, "Yeah, sure, whatever." and then go about your business as if nothing more than a gnat got in your face. You've treated the comment with as much respect and care that it deserves. Try it and see.

Turns out we have a perfect example of raycism in the ministry playing out before us. The UU World published this on March 29, 2018 [HERE]:

And then the Washington Post published this on April 17, 2018 [HERE]

What indeed?

In reading this article, and then following up with church and denominational publications, a story becomes clear, but it's not the story of institutional raycism, but rather a story of demonstrated incompetence in the ministry, institutional failure at both the church level and the denominational level and is the story of an antagonist in the church that both everyone and no one is talking about.

Buckle up. This is going to be one HELL of a ride.

[Continued...HERE]

Your Old Pal,
Devilhead

It's Funny Because it's True

Just something hilarious I chanced upon. It's funny because it's true.

Your Old Pal,
Devilhead

True Story: Conversation with a Former Congregant

A bit of background for context.

I've always been remarkably observant. I'm extremely introverted. I'm an extroverted introvert, which means I have little to no problem interacting with large groups of people... but then I'll sleep for two days afterward.

For the most part, in groups of people I tend to hang back a little and observe. I don't mean some of what is known as "people watching" but rather really observing. I guess I've done it so much for so much of my life that it has become a blink. (Read the Malcolm Gladwell book.) A blink is when you can size up a situation in nano-seconds.

In the ministry, this was observed and commented upon by the then NY Metro District Executive, Rev. Howell Lind, and then by PNW District Exectutive, Janine Larson. In both cases after being in a room for about five minutes I could size up what was going on with everyone's ministry. Again, this ability had been commented upon more than once by two different District Execs.

There's no magic to it. It just comes by paying attention. It's one thing to observe, another to use the information you get.

I had one fight back in high school. Not a punch was thrown, but I won hands down. Here's how it happened:

One day a high school bully decided that I would be a good choice to pick on. I was a skinny kid. He walked up to me started to talk shit and push me. A small crowd was gathering. At that point my daemon's voice spoke to me: "Tell him the truth about his life."

So, I did.

I just began to talk, very, very calmly, and I told him what I saw, the observations, the inferences and asked him over and over, "Do you like your life?" As I did something happened that I had never expected. His lip began to quiver, "shut up." Not gonna happen. I continued to tell him about his home life (remember there's a crowd now), his failed relationships, his stupidity, all with examples. His knees buckled and he fell to the ground. "Leave me alone."

"Why? You chose to pick on me." Oh, no, we're not done yet. I kept talking. I stopped when he was on the ground in a fetal position sobbing. The crowd's eyes were agog. What they witnessed was someone calmly talking, and someone else falling to the ground. People started to back away from me. It was over.

The fight was over. But I wanted to make sure this was over for good. As the crowd began to back away, I leaned over the bully and said, very calmly, "I held back. Next time I won't."

I never had a problem again, he left me alone. Those who witnessed this avoided me like the plague -- they were fucking spooked. There were rumors spread about me. I was okay with that.

That's the background.

Yesterday I ran into a former congregant outside a Starbucks, right here in Spokane.

[By the way, and this has nothing to do with anything, I find Starbucks coffee to be disgusting, it's severely over-roasted and because of that it tastes like shit. It's not as awful as UUSC Coffee Project coffee, but that will be a whole other post. (Hint: the coffee is terrible because of Unitarian Universalist racism and classism. No other reason, really.)]

This was a congregant who found my ministry threatening to her status quo and worked tirelessly to get me out of the church. She never thought I knew, so she was always super friendly to my face.

It was a weird conversation, she was overly, falsely friendly and seemed to want to pump me for info. "Tell me all about what's been going on for you..." She mostly seemed to focus on how I can afford to live in my house, since leaving the church. She wanted to know how I was earning my living.

Reality is I've been retired since 25. I made a lot of money early as a food photographer, invested well, and have basically spend my life from 25 on in a state of semi-retirement. Working when I wanted, for fun, or extra money for larger purchases, such as a top of the line electric car and real estate, but otherwise just hanging out. My congregations knew this. I made it clear that I was retired and the ministry was a second (hobby) career. No one believed me.

Since leaving the ministry I studied and became a private investigator (when I operate, I operate out of Idaho which has no licensing requirements), and I occasionally shoot porn professionally under the name Donnie Wishman (an homage to one of my favorite film makers: Doris Wishman). In both cases, I only do the stuff that interests me.

Several of my former congregants know I'm a private investigator because I was the one who turned them into the IRS. Most of the ones I turned in stopped going to church and left the area afterwards. Maybe it's too much to have your former minister turn you in to the IRS for tax-fraud. Good grief! Your own minister knows you're a fraud and a cheat and knew it the second you started to play with your pledge to manipulate the church. The rewards are lovely; the money a plus, and the emotional payoff is amazing.

So I said, "I have my own porn production company, it's been doing well." Her eyes began to spin in her head. I didn't initially have the heart to tell her that her own alienated slut daughter has appeared in several of my productions. (Yup, I'm an asshole.)

She was a pseudo-feminist and I just touched her trigger. "Pornography!" The floodgates opened. Verbal diarrhea started to spray everywhere. It went on and on with platitudes and talking points she read somewhere, or made up on the spot. I'm pretty sure that she even threw in the fish and bicycles thing.

As she went on and on she looked like a badly drawn cartoon character. It was funny. It was hilarious. I couldn't help it, I burst out laughing directly in her face.

"I don't see what's so funny."

"You are. You don't actually believe the shit you're saying, do you?"

She got redder, and the torrent became even more unhinged. And then my daemon said, "Tell her the truth."

So, I did.

I told her that having raised her own alienated daughter in such a piss-poor manner she turned to porn to supplement her student income at Evergreen State College. And as far as I was concerned, it was all on her.

I stopped when the tears began to gush. I put my hand on her shoulder, and she thought I was going to comfort her. Not today. "I held back. Next time I won't."

Your Old Pal,
Devilhead

Devilhead Predicts

Apparently, it's been an interesting time in Unitarian Universalist land. Ministries are blowing up all over the place. It's pure comedy.

I call it comedy because like an old Three Stooges short, the actors are blissfully unaware that it was and continues to be their own actions that directly contributed to their fate. The funniest comedies are those where the protagonist(s) double down on the exact things that caused the trouble in the first place, with the full expectation that doing more of the same, more intensely, will bring salvation.

One may think I'm mean for saying this, or that I am an asshole, and I can assure you that I am both.

However, what I say is the truth. I get emails from people all the time telling me how much they agree with what I've written even as they feel uncomfortable with the way I point it out. My response is always the same, "Tell me (with proof) what isn't true." The reply is always the same: it's the truth, but we wish it would be "nicer." Here's reality: nice is not a virtue. Never has been. The truth is an uber-virtue. Yet, in the queendom of lies, truth is seen as the deadliest sin.

The Unitarian Universalist Association is dying. Approximately a year ago given a few things that were done in the name of "institutional change" I declared that the UUA had five years to go. Today, I declare that the UUA has four years left.

For example, since instituting the Commission on Institutional Change, since the founding of BLUU, since the demand that congregations hold "white-supremacy teach-ins", as of March 29, 2018 FIFTEEN people of color had issues with their ministries. [LINK HERE]

This is only talking about the ministries of "people of color." Are these the only ministries that count? What of the others? Seriously, do they not count? In an ongoing, and worsening, ministerial shortage it seems that some ministries are still expendable. Oh, well, old dogs and all that.

Truth is this is much, much, much more widespread than fifteen people of color. Triple that number for non-people of color, add the two together, and you're closer to what's going on. I've got this from an inside source. This is some bad shit.

And as the UUA has no ability (nor real inclination) to actually fix the situation, but rather seems only equipped to virtue signal while fluttering about wringing their collective hands, this situation will get noticeably worse. There's a reason for this: what's actually going on doesn't fit the narrative. What's a narrative? A narrative is a work of fiction.

The reality is there are many ministries in trouble in the UUA. Rev. Dr. Daniel O'Connell was booted from Houston, TX; Rev. Aaron McEmrys tossed from Arlington, VA; Rev. Dr. Robert Hardies is about to be hung up to dry in Washington DC. Nobody's talking about them. Why? In these three cases, all sent to me by readers, not one is black or female. Is that why no one is talking about them? [I hope that's not the case. That would be pretty fucking racist.] Are these ministers expendable? Or, are the institutional blinders such that no one is seeing these ministries as important, or even seeing them at all? Don't know.

The fiction of course is that this is only happening to "people of color", or that "people of color" are the only ones who count. Read the article again HERE. What do you take away from this article from an official Unitarian Universalist source?

Based on the longstanding tradition of institutional myopia evidenced by the collective brain trust at the UUA, here are my predictions:

1. The gap between congregations and the Unitarian Universalist Association will continue to grow at a fairly quick pace.
2. The brain trust at the Unitarian Universalist Association are institutionally incapable of understanding this, and will continue to blame the various isms for their own lack of foresight and planning.
3. Efforts to fix the situation by doubling down on already failed policies will exacerbate the situation.
4. They are getting to a point where this won't be able to be undone as smarter congregations will do an actual cost analysis of the benefits and costs of association with the UUA.
5. The UUA has four years left.

Time will tell. I've been wrong before and will be wrong again, but time will tell.

Your Old Pal,

Devilhead

Devilhead Predicted

In my previous blog, Unitarian Universalist Nightmares, I focused upon several congregations and ministries that crossed my path, reviewed and rated them, and commented on what I saw. I'm an observant person. My comments and predictions are not magick, just observation. The truth is that if one pays attention, anyone is capable of seeing what is right in front of their noses, but sadly, and actually tragically, very very few seldom do.

One of the very few regrets I have is that I took down Unitarian Universalist Nightmares. Only a tiny fraction of it remains on the Wayback Machine, and there's very little left in which to link. Oh well...

While the blog had existed for a half-dozen years, what got Unitarian Universalist Nightmares started was a streaming service from the Arlington, VA church. This was in January 2015.

What I saw when I watched this streamed service was an energetic minister who it seemed had some vision and sparkle, Rev. Aaron McEmrys,  being upstaged by the associate minister Rev. Linda Olson Peebles.

I'll never forget this performance because it seemed that the only point of Rev. Peebles "talk" was to upstage the actual called minister of the congregation. She just rambled on and on to the point where my partner, another former minister, turned to me to ask if I thought she was drunk. No, I didn't think she was. But that disgraceful performance was such that I could understand the comparison between Rev. Peebles in the pulpit and a babbling wet-brain drunk.

I predicted at the time that Rev. McEmrys was at the end of his ministry as it appeared that Rev. Peebles was marking her territory by excreting all over the place. (Mental and verbal excretion is still excretion.) Turns out that I was wrong. Rev. McEmrys was six months into his brand new ministry as senior minister of Arlington.

At the time I made a few observations:

1. Rev. McEmrys ministry was in some serious fucking trouble.
2. The associate minister demonstrated that she didn't understand her place in a team...
   or didn't give a shit.
3. The congregation appeared clueless; this was all just a regular Sunday morning.

What I didn't say then but will now is that watching that revolting display in the pulpit triggered the PTSD I received from my experience with my last church. I've seen this shit before, up close and personal. I've seen it countless times in other ministries with the colleagues I've known. This is not isolated behavior, in fact Associate Ministers usurping the authority of the congregation (in the guise of the Senior Minister the congregation called and authorized) appears to be the norm. 

What we saw in the pulpit that Sunday seemed to both of us to be a clear turf statement that the associate was not going to tolerate this or any future senior minister with "vision" or "ideas" to change a nice sinecure into actual work. Really, was there any other explanation for such a childish display? 

Flash forward three years later: Rev. McEmrys has resigned his position mid-year...

Newsletter, Jan 4, 2018 [LINK HERE] 

suddenly...

Newsletter, Jan 11, 2018 [LINK HERE]

placed on "administrative leave"...

Newsletter, Jan 18, 2018 [LINK HERE]

a complaint against his ministry was/is being investigated... [LINK HERE]

Board of Trustees Update, March 15, 2018 (the ides of March) [LINK HERE]

While a year previously, Rev. Peebles had "retired" and been made Minister Emerita of Arlington. I say retired because she's serving as an interim minister at another congregation. I guess the ministry shortage [which we'll probably revisit soon] is still very real.

Board of Trustees Update, March 15, 2018 [LINK HERE]
(Compare the above statement against observations #2 and 3 above, kinda proves both, doesn't it?)

In any case, Arlington's rid of that one, maybe the next minister will get a shot.

Nah... this is Unitarian Universalism.

The norm is to get rid of a minister who appeared to have something on the ball (a bit of vision and the like), investigate his ministry, appear to reward bad behavior in all of those who surround said minister, all the while a ministry shortage is happening. What could possibly go wrong?

Question to which I don't have the answer: Was bad behavior rewarded in this situation? I don't know but am open to hearing the truth of what happened.

[Rev. McEmrys, if you're out there, we'd love to hear from you. Contact me HERE.]

Your Old Pal,
Devilhead

By the way, I'm back. You won't believe how Unitarian Universalism is killing itself! I'm back to help my readers enjoy the decline. There's lots to enjoy.

And my email traffic has increased a bit lately. This blog is beginning to get the interest that Unitarian Universalist Nightmares had, and for much the same reason. Thank you.

Just Loving this Vortex of Weirdness

Spokane, Washington, is a vortex of weirdness.

I know. I live in Spokane.

It's a glorious city. I'm not being ironic when I say this. Part of what makes it a glorious city is the perception that it is one of the point blank strangest, oddest, most surreal places in the US. I say surreal and I mean it in the way the original French surrealist poets and painters meant it. Read a few Surrealist manifestos, you'll understand. Here in Spokane the weirdness tends to Dada like levels. Read a few Dada manifestos, you'll understand.

Here is a perfectly good lite example of Spokane weirdness.

On April 30, 2018 this billboard appeared downtown, and immediately afterwards it began to make the rounds on the internet as a meme:

[None of these memes are original to me. All were found on the Spokane Memes FB page.]

Apparently no one on the design team, the team responsible for putting up the billboard, the City Council, or any other group encountering the bears for that matter, thought that placing the two bears next to each other might seem... I don't know... odd.

There was plenty of space to separate the bears, maybe even have the standing bear waving to us. I can almost guarantee the design team discussed that, "Don't have the  bears waving, they don't do that in the wild, Merle. And put the bears closer together, we need 'THE GREAT PNW' to take up more than half the billboard's real estate."

What the leaders and designers missed, Spokaloo Sally saw immediately. The result?

Wow, that was fast.

Then the internet responded.

There were a lot more than this one. There has been an online petition to bring the bears back.

I just heard that the bears will be made into a tee shirt. This is Spokane.

Your Old Pal,
Devilhead