Friday, February 23, 2018

Everything I Know about Unitarian Universalism, I Learned as Chalice Lighter - Part 4

[Continued from Here.]

There were several "roll-outs" to various area councils of the district.

(Area councils no longer actually existed, but were treated to exist by nearly everyone in the district. That's another story for another  time. Suffice it to say that it, like most stories of institutional Unitarian Universalism, tends to reflect poorly on the bureaucracy of the Unitarian Universalist Association.)

An idea as "radical" as the new Chalice Lighter program needed to be rolled out to the appropriate parties along the way. It was rolled out to the district board, and as stated above, following that to several of the local area gatherings of Unitarian Universalists.

The district board was the easiest of the presentations. Why? Because I was a known quality. I was serving a congregation in the district that was by all accounts showing signs of vibrant health and well-being; this after a rocky several decades as a congregation. I had served on local committees. And I had served on several as hoc committees of the district board. In other words, they knew who I was and how I worked. Their response to me was "let's give it a go and see what happens."

The Long Island area council, again, trusted the idea. Why? They trusted me. I was one of theirs. It really was that simple.

It's when I presented to the area council in New Jersey that things were, I don't know... weirdly hostile. Why? They had no clue who I was. I was an unknown in every aspect. I was a minister from "over there" in Long Island.

Most of the questions were along the lines of "How do you expect this to work AT ALL since it's different?" My personal favorite exchange was during the questions part of the presentation between myself and a member of some 17 member "church" [social club (long since dissolved)] who took issue with the fact that the new Chalice Lighters program would have no set dollar amount per ask.

"Do you mean to tell us that people can give whatever they want?"

"We encourage people to be generous and not limit their generosity to $10."

"Suppose they only want to give a dollar, or just a penny?" this said with that smug look. Unitarian Universalist ministers all know what that smug look looks like. To me that smug look looks exactly like the special ed kid who is convinced she's the class valedictorian. Only the other special ed kids buy the bullshit. Everybody else wants to get back to something constructive.

"People give what they want. We encourage people to be as generous as possible."

"But they don't have to be."

"They don't 'have to be' now."

What surprised me then, but doesn't now, is that the single most hostile response came from the minister of the congregation that was supposed to receive the next Chalice Lighters call...

[Continued...Here]

Your Old Pal
Devilhead

Monday, February 12, 2018

Everything I Know about Unitarian Universalism, I Learned as Chalice Lighter - Part 3

[Continued from Here.]

The program itself was very simple in idea and execution. It was predicated upon several assumptions I had:

  1. Congregations, not individuals, are the focus of the Unitarian Universalist Association of Congregations 
  2. Congregations communicating and working together is good.
  3. Creativity is good.
  4. Enthusiasm is good.
  5. I am lazy.
[This last piece was/is important.]

During all of this, a vision of a barn-raising came to me, and it was used in the initial promotions of the New York Metro District's Chalice Lighters Program.

The idea was a simple one: Congregations helping Congregations. 

And it worked like this: About a month before a Chalice Lighters call, congregations would receive a small packet from the district office which contained several pieces of promotional materials about the project and the congregation seeking aide [information put together by the congregation seeking the grant], some clipart for the newsletter, and a letter encouraging people to be creative. That was it. It was up to each congregation's leadership how they would respond to the Chalice Lighters call. 

Some might just give a grant from the congregation, others might hold a special offering, still others would replicate the old Chalice Lighters model of direct mail to their members. The point is it didn't matter. That's Chaos. It's also the only place from whence creativity may arise. Creativity was strongly encouraged and congregations encouraged to rise to the occasion.

Bottom line... it was up to the congregations to decide how to treat fellow congregations. To that end, as much as possible, everything was removed that got in the way of direct communication.

The District Executive loved this approach. Ultimately so did the congregations. And I'm glad because this was designed for the congregations, no one else. 

[Continued... Here.]

Sunday, February 11, 2018

Everything I Know about Unitarian Universalism, I Learned as Chalice Lighter - Part 2

[Continued from Here.]

Having taken on the role of Chalice Lighter for the New York Metro District of the UUA, now I had to do something constructive.

As stated in the previous post, the average call for a chalice lighter was about $700, and if I wanted to do a good job all I had to do was double that... That's it? Where's the problem?

Confession time: I had already soured on the Chalice Lighters program in the New York Metro District. I had signed up to be a Chalice Lighter, which at the time meant I would receive no more than three calls a year, at $10 a call. I signed up as a high school student, ready for college. I received one call, paid it and never heard from them again.

It's not that I didn't try.

Each time I moved as a young adult, I sent in a change of address notification to the Chalice Lighters. I moved three times, and three times notifications were sent. I did that for a period of about five years.

I reasoned, rather naively, that if the entire program ran on an up-to-date mailing list, it was imperative that there be an up-to-date mailing list. So, as soon as I got my hands on the mailing list I looked for my name, I found it, ten years later... with my parents' address listed. Clearly the three change of address notifications had no effect. I concluded, also rather naively, that if my address had not been changed despite my reaching out [3x !!!] to keep my address current, this may have happened to other people.

As it turns out, that was the case with much of the list. The list was best described as a work of fiction.

So, when presented with something completely broken, one has options. One can rebuild what was broken. One can re-create something from scratch. Or one can create something brand new.

I went with the latter. I went with it for several reasons.

For starters, ever try to fix something completely broken? Imagine a car with two-thirds to three-quarters of the parts broken or missing. Is it better to rebuild the car? Maybe if it's a priceless vintage auto. But, some old beater car? Much, much easier to purchase a replacement car, and cheaper. Less headaches too.

So... if we're going to purchase a new vehicle, why just a car? The world of possibilities opens up. It's exciting and creative. Exciting and creative, as it turns out, makes bureaucrats squirmy and uncomfortable.

At this time, Denny was moderator. She had a propensity to fart out "programs" [edicts] for congregations to follow. One of which, the name eludes me, was some pronouncement that congregations would benefit from communicating and working together. There was more to it than that, but the general idea was the Unitarian Universalist Association wanted to see congregations communicating and working with each other.

To me that sounded great. What I naively misunderstood at the time was that when the Unitarian Universalist Association says it wants congregations communicating and working with each other, that's not what it means at all. What it meant was the UUA wanted to see congregations communicating and working together under its watchful eye, in carefully structured events, all under the direction and gaze of the bureaucrats.

I found out that the absolutely last thing the bureaucrats want, is for congregations to freely communicate, work together, and inspire each other. It makes them super uncomfortable and squirmy. Let's face it, if congregations communicate with each other, they may come up with ideas that work splendidly without the Associations assistance/direction. When they work together they discover they can do things they never thought possible... usually cheaper and without the bureaucratic ideological baggage attached. To the bureaucrats this sort of thinking is both heresy and treason. In my defense, I went with what they said they wanted, not the unspoken meaning behind their words.

And my final piece was my own perspective being a practitioner of ceremonial and chaos magicks. I desired a place where magick can happen. In the process we took away the $10 "limit" on Chalice Lighters and told people, be generous.

I communicated all of this (not the magick piece, I have always kept that to myself until now) to our District Executive and again stressed that I was going to build up a brand new program, and in the quest to raise money and assist congregations in the goal of working together, the old program would be dead as the new sprang from its ashes.

His reply, "Let's try it. See if it works."

[Continued...Here.]

Your Old Pal,
Devilhead

Friday, February 9, 2018

Everything I Know about Unitarian Universalism, I Learned as Chalice Lighter - Part 1

I recently learned that the New York Metro District (which no longer exists; it was eaten by the Central East Region) re-visioned their unique Chalice Lighters program to be identical to the Chalice Lighters programs all across the country. I'm pretty sure, though not positive, that this happened around 2014.

The thing with the New York Metro District's Chalice Lighters program was that it was both successful and wildly popular, and from its inception was loathed by the bureaucrats in the UUA. Loathed is probably too mild a term. As the program was instituted in 1996, and killed re-visioned in 2014, that's eighteen years of being a thorn in the side of the Unitarian Universalist Association, all the while literally doing nothing but good.

Read that last sentence again. It's 100% true.

And every single bureaucrat at the Unitarian Universalist Association hated the program. That's also 100% true.

Can you see the cosmic joke? 

First a little direct history, dates may be off as this is from memory, but otherwise you're getting it from the creator of the now very dead New York Metro District's Chalice Lighter program.

I was serving my second congregation, the first being a year-long consulting gig to a now dead congregation. I knew them well. It's best they're dead.

Things were going well in my congregation in Freeport, NY. I had settled in, weathered a divorce, and the congregation was growing. That said, I felt it was time to give back a bit to the district. 

I spoke with our District Executive (another dead position?) and made it clear that if there was some way to serve the district, I was available. His response was immediate, "I want you to take on Chalice Lighters." 

"Oh shit that program is really fucking broken." I thought to myself. I said aloud "What are the parameters?"

"Raise money." he replied.

"That's it? What I mean is, do I have freedom to change the program?"

"As long as you raise more money than we usually get, feel free."

"How much money does an average call receive?" I asked.

"About $700."

I just looked at him in silence, then, "I could write a check for that..."

"That's the point. This program's completely broken. You can't break it. If you put any effort in at all, you'll easily double the average call amount."

And so I took on the position of Chalice Lighter in the New York Metro District.

[Continued...Here.]

Your Ol' Pal,
Devilhead